Last fall Chris Stapleton appeared in a Sunday morning interview on NBC with Willie Geist. In a moment reflecting on the “how” of his music making, Chris pointed to a chair he’s used as he’s recorded all of his albums and said, “It’s home.”
We get sentimental about objects for that “home” feeling among other reasons, making it difficult to let go sometimes. These are the artifacts of our lives! Today, we’re sharing our green-yellow-red light approach to reevaluating your sentimental collections.
But, Reader, beware! If you are waiting for us to say, “Just take a picture of the item you want to remember,” this is not the article for you.
In this digital age, we accumulate photos as fast as dishes in the kitchen waiting to be washed. Each photo you take and let slip 100s and 1000s back in your camera roll, even if filed into a folder, is a missed opportunity. You could have captured what’s so meaningful about it while the details were fresh. You could have shared it with someone to connect over a shared memory. So, please, take the photo, we agree, but in the next moment or same day, Artifct that. Okay, now on with today’s article!
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Letting Go Can Be Really Hard. Full stop.
When it comes to letting go of objects of sentimental value, some of us manage better than others. Some of us do not even consider ourselves sentimental and regularly “trim the fat.” The rest of us need all the help we can get.
Our reasons and motivations for letting go of items vary:
You’re downsizing and truly can’t keep it all.
You’re mindful that you have a lot of stuff and do not want to burden your family someday with figuring out what to do with it all.
You’re going through a decluttering process, because it’s beginning to feel like your walls are closing in on you. Psst ... A real or pretend household move can be a very effective motivator to declutter – less to pack and less to pay to move, too!
As we set out to learn existing strategies for letting go of sentimental items, we canvassed the literature, decluttering blogs and videos, and more than a dozen books on the subjects. While the examples and stories differed, along with the viewpoints (scientific, minimalist, Christian, you name it!), it felt like there wasn’t much separating one approach from another. We distilled our learnings into a green-yellow-red light process for you to consider, “What do I want to do with this ‘thing?’”
First, Why DO People Keep Sentimental Items?
The answer to this question is especially important for all of us with someone in our life who we think is particularly sentimental, and we just can’t relate. Some of the most common reasons we found for people keeping items of emotional value that you should keep in mind include:
The item was important to someone else who you loved or respected.
It makes you happy to have it, usually because of a memory it evokes.
You’ve had it a long time and it would feel strange to get rid of it. This is related to a concept called the “endowment effect.” If we own it, it has more value.
It’s the “last” of something or otherwise rare, or at least you think it is. This could also lead to a slippery slope of expectation that it has monetary value, too, today or “someday.”
Emotional security – knowing it’s there makes you feel better.
Just because. Yes, that’s it. Let’s call this, “It’s in the eye of the beholder.”
Letting Go of Sentimental Items: Green-Yellow-Red Light
If you have spent time with an elementary school aged child during the last decade, you may have heard of this green-yellow-red approach to teaching kids about the spectrum of foods and their value to our bodies. Green foods are “go foods,” and you should enjoy them every day as you wish because they are so good for you. Yellow foods are “whoa foods,” and should be enjoyed in moderation. Red foods are those for which you should stop before putting in your mouth and consider a better option. They are not good for your body.
The beauty of this framework is its dual simplicity and flexibility. Today we’re applying a green-yellow-red light framework to help you to parse through your belongings and just maybe let go of a few.
It’s important to emphasize that systems like these must be adapted to personal starting points and circumstances. Hoarding disorders, grief, and other situations may require different approaches, ranging from professional support to grace and space.
Green items: Keep, enjoy, display. Clearly this stuff matters! This might be the stuff you re-clutter with after you clear out the rest.
Yellow items: Reconsider. Maybe there’s a better home or opportunity to repurpose some of these items.
Red items: Halt: declutter! Red light items often have an overwhelming number of items in the same category or have had no use or value to you for years, making them ripe for thinning out over time. Remember, it does not have to be all at once!
Here are illustrative examples from each category to help you prioritize as you let go of sentimental items.
GREEN LIGHT – Give yourself a pass.
It absolutely adds value to your life, brings you joy or peace, or some other benefit. You don’t have to justify this feeling. (Remember our recent ARTIcles story, “We all deserve a Purple Bin!”) You’ll know it reflexively when you look at the item. This is a category of items that may have already been pared back, for example, if you kept only a few items that belonged to your spouse who passed.
You use or display & enjoy it and have no need to replace or change.
It is financially valuable, too. Do not pinch pennies here. It’s valuable and you are going to keep it because it’s doing no harm, and you would only get rid of it if you sold it. (Check out our ARTIcles story, From Rare Art to Family Heirlooms: Tips From a Master as You Consider Selling Your 'Stuff.') When you Artifct it, be sure to attach the receipt, appraisal, and or certificate of authenticity in the ‘Documentation’ section and as many details as possible, potentially including how and where you got it (provenance), dimensions, weight, and any signatures or maker’s mark(s). Bonus: Use Artifcts’ “What’s it worth?” button if you are curious about the item’s current market valuation.
If a family vote were taken, the majority would say, "Keep!”We have this broken pair of Rudolph glasses. I wanted to buy a new pair and was strongly vetoed. These glasses have been with us a long time, and my family found a new way to use them in their broken state.
YELLOW LIGHT – It might be time to go.
Books. You might be surprised to reread “favorites” of yours only to discover they are favorites no longer. Your tastes shift. Books are a good category of objects to pause on and really consider whether you need each one.I’ll never get rid of my copy of Rooftops of Tehran. Even if I don’t love it one day, I remember the impact it had on me when I first read it. It stays. But recently I did reread some “critically acclaimed” books I remember enjoying and have moved with me several times, but they didn’t make the cut this time. I donated them.
Battletested and/or antique kitchenware. How much of Grandma’s old cookware do you need to keep to remember what an amazing cook she was or how much you loved to cook with her or the smell of her bread in the oven? And if you are actually using it, consider if it is still safe to use. Can you reduce what you’ve kept to a few representative pieces? Maybe even retire some to become fun décor.
Special textiles. Table linens, children's clothing and costumes, loved blankets, this is another area that’s easy to accumulate and squish just a bit more into that shelf or bin. And being practical, too, it’s easier to quickly try and give it a pass. If it’s all getting used, well, then that makes sense, unless of course you’re running out of space. Plus, linens tend to age without you truly SEEING the signs of age (stains, yellowing, fraying edges …). Use season changes to reconsider and maybe even “treat” yourself to something new to replace some you are letting go of.
RED LIGHT – Some of these items need to go.
Boxes and boxes of items from a loved one who has passed. It’s taking up space somewhere, and to what end? If you're ready, pick out only those items that truly resonate with you. Consider who else could want it and benefit from the rest or open it up, video it, and send to family to give them a chance to make a claim.
Relics of a former career, student or professional. Do you have college notebooks and textbooks from decades ago. Why? What about awards and mementos? Others are very unlikely to really understand what if any of this matters either if you haven’t told them the stories (or better yet, Artifcted them.) I was really proud of an econometric study I did in graduate school in large part because of the note the professor wrote on the final copy. I don’t know compelled me to keep the physical copy for decades, but I can tell you now that it’s Artifcted, I finally recycled it.
Kid clutter. This is the artwork, awards, presents and so much more that multiplies like bunny rabbits inside closets, under beds, and in what was once a previously (momentarily?) organized and functional system of bins. It is absolutely fair game to put this category into a regular decluttering rotation with your child(ren). Why? It is especially vulnerable to you forgetting what it was and why you and your kids kept it anyway because of the sheer volume.Be careful in this category not to go overboard. Consider our learnings shared in, “Before You Thin Out That Stuffed Animal Collection, Consider What Scientists Have to Say.”
A Parting Story and Message to Consider
When our co-founder Ellen Goodwin (@egoody) traveled to Arizona to Artifct with her 97-year-old great aunt, what stood out were the things her aunt had chosen to keep as she came to the end of her lifetime and the stories they told. Having downsized to so very little, chief among the items her great aunt wanted Ellen to see were a pair of goggles, a brochure, and a testing piece she used to become certified to weld airplanes during WWII. Check out #MurielsStories.
What matters to us all, what TRULY matters, shifts over time. Do not feel pressured to move too fast to declutter and/or downsize unless life circumstances give you no real choice in the matter. Even then, please remember to take a moment to smell the roses and remember the value of what you have and, sometimes, the emotional and practical (less to dust!) value of letting go.
In today’s ARTIcles story, we’re taking you inside the homes of our co-founders, both of whom celebrate the winter season with Christmas trees and an abundance of ornaments. You might celebrate other holidays with a different set of traditional holiday décor, and we bet it too has stories to tell of holidays and people of years past and present.
Whether you have holiday heirlooms, family traditions, or simple merriment guiding your holiday décor, we hope you’ll remember to take a moment to create an Artifct and share a story or two with your friends and family this season.
Step Inside the Goodwin Home with Co-founder Ellen
Our tree is certainly merry and bright. The ornaments include those from my own childhood as well as those from my travels and annual “pick an ornament” outings with my daughter.
This year’s tree decorating was unique, because my parents came to visit and decorated the tree with us. As we decorated, we naturally shared stories about the ornaments. It was the chattiest our daughter was all weekend as she oohed and aahed over her ornaments and reminded us of which ones had to be placed together.
This year’s new arrival is custom artwork from Brittany Atkinson, based in Austin, Texas. The ornament is more of an investment than usual ornaments, but I love supporting local artists. The bold design and colors definitely won my daughter’s stamp of approval.
I have a thing for nutcrackers, they adorn our house during Christmas, and they hang on our tree, too. I wish I could find more ornaments just like this one, a gift from my mom years ago.
My daughter insists on pairing these sweet ornaments together on the tree each year. When she picked these out, it was the only time she got two ornaments instead of one to add to the tree. She named them Autumn and Oscar.
A few weeks before Christmas in 2012, I had surgery and was on crutches. While laid up, I had the bright idea to make these gingerbread and gold glitter cutout ornaments. Just me at home with a 2.5-year-old and really really REALLY sticky dough. What was I thinking? I’m delighted they’ve last this long.
Sometimes I just want something classic and clean. Last year I chose a candycane design with a traditional shape made of heavy glass. It's another nice pop of color on the tree.
And Now Step Inside the Nickerson Home with Co-founder Heather
Remember the Dr. Seus book, "Oh the Places You'll Go?" Every time I see our tree, I think of that book and smile, as our tree has evolved over the years to become a memory map of the places we've been and the adventures we've had year after year. Each ornament, although decorative by default, holds a deeper meaning to us, and brings back memories from our travels near and far.
A beaded hummingbird ornament reminds us of our girls trip to Belize with @egoody and @vgoody "way back when" the girls still thought it was cool to travel with their parents.
Our handmade Danish felt ornaments remind us of our visits to our family in Denmark and all the adventures we've had over the years with @Jeanet_Johansen.
One of the older ornaments on our tree, my beloved Parsa Craft ornaments from my time in Afghanistan. Each ornament is handmade from the women that make up the Parsa Craft collective in Kabul. These ornaments have managed to survive multiple moves and two golden retriever puppies.
This one always makes me smile! When COVID hit, our travels came to a screeching halt. What to do? We hit the trails and the mountains with our trusty two-person backpacking tent. Imagine my surprise when I found a tent ornament that was an exact match to our tent.
Last but not least, one of my favorites! @Matt and I bought this ornament after our first trip to Iceland. It is one of the heaviest ornaments on our tree, which means we spend a great deal of time each year deciding which branch it goes on lest it slips to an untimely demise. (Which is not unheard of in our house with the dog and the children!)
Sorry, this Artifct is private!
Feeling inspired? Take a look around your tree, your mantle, or wherever you keep your holiday decor and pick an item to get started. Simply snap a photo, add a short story and any fun details, click save, and you're done! Got a growing collection on your hands? Create custom tags using the Tags feature to quickly sort and search through your collection. Some of our favorites this year? #Ornaments, #Holidays2024, and #Cookies!
We're preparing our ARTIcles for 2025. Have a topic you'd like us to cover? Share with us at Editor@Artifcts.com.
If you want to truly enjoy the holidays and not just operate in survival mode, take some advice from Santa Claus himself, who’s known for “Making a list and checking it twice.”
While you could potentially remember everything that needs to get done and also smoothly delegate along the way, why would you do that to yourself when you could plan it out and recycle and update those plans year after year? You wouldn’t be the first person to wing it and then gasp when they realize they’re missing a particular gift, key ingredient, or even the tickets to the annual holiday lights show that they never miss.
Today in ARTIcles by Artifcts, we’re sharing tips from the pros in hopes of keeping your holiday season merry and bright.
The following is based on the Fall 2023 Evenings with Artifcts episode featuring C. Lee Cawley of simplify YOU, Jill Katz of One to Zen Organizing, and Samara Goodman of Samara Interiors. If you prefer to watch the Evenings conversation, pop over to YouTube now.
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Shift Your Frame of Mind and Start with Clear Goals
The holiday season is filled with micro changes to your routines and your home, which can make even the most laid back among us a bit stressed out and edgy, Jill told us. While Jill specializes in organizational services for neurodivergent people, you’ll discover her strategies and tools can keep us all in the holiday spirit.
WHERE IS YOUR MIND AT ON ALL THINGS HOLIDAYS?
To counteract feelings of frustration and anxiety, Jill suggests shifting your frame of mind about the lead up and the moments that make up your holidays in two key ways:
First, embrace that preparation is part of the holiday fun.Give yourself the space during the weeks ahead for prep activities like:
Choosing gifts thoughtfully, not frantically
Hand writing notes on holiday cards
Planning menus that come together to light up everyone’s taste buds
Creating music playlists
Second, absolutely avoid urges for perfection. Take a step back and remember why you are doing all this to start with and breathe. What do you want to remember about this holiday one year from now? Five years from now? We bet it’s about how you felt, not whether that centerpiece matched Martha Stewart’s design or that cake looked as good on your table as it did for Ina Garten.
WHAT WILL SUCCESS LOOK LIKE FOR YOU?
Now let’s consider your goals for the season. Are your holiday plans designed to guarantee more family time? Are you seeking to create a new holiday tradition this year?
To reach your goals and avoid madly racing thoughts that will detract from what’s important, track your holiday routines and to-dos. This will also help you to avoid starting from scratch next year. While you might like a pad of paper or digital note, hands down our panel recommends digitally accessible and customizable spreadsheets.
Before you decide spreadsheets are too intense or complicated, hear us out. A spreadsheet lets you simply list out your to-dos based on when they need to be done, e.g. 4 weeks out, 3 weeks out etc., so you can keep track of the multitude of tasks and subtasks that are part of your holiday routine.
Common holiday to-do items from our panelists’ own spreadsheets:
Taking out and putting up decorations
Buying tickets for a holiday event
Planning the menu and its corresponding shopping list
Ordering custom holiday cards (and noting the “no later than” date for getting them mailed)
Gathering or buying materials related to annual traditions
Making any needed repairs around the house before guests arrive
Choosing and selecting a hostess gift for parties you’ll attend
Tackling cleaning tasks big and small
Pressing tablecloths and napkins
Buying flowers for the table or around the house
Ordering items that will sell out early or have shipping timelines that could threaten your fun
Last year our co-founder Ellen added a new recipe to her family's annual Christmas Eve open house: sugared cranberries. Now those ingredients are added to her annual shopping list.
Creating a Welcoming Space
Hosting this year? Great. We’re ready with tips for you.
PAPER CLUTTER
As the holiday season begins, get a strategy in place for one of the top sources of holiday clutter: paper! We’re talking about cards and flyers, donation requests from charities, and holiday cards, too.
C. Lee suggests buying or repurposing a decorative bin (with a lid) that you don’t mind setting out in your space to catch all the incoming catalogs and other generic mail. “But have a second box just for holiday cards that you do not want miss and may also include checks, cash, or gift cards.”
You’ll also likely generate some necessary paperwork during the holidays that C. Lee recommends you place into a durable labeled folder. What might this include? Copies of travel documents and itineraries, last year’s holiday card (to help you decide on this year’s), gift lists and ideas, receipts, and more.
Pre- or post-holidays, our handy Get Papered checklist can help you declutter all that paper! CLICK THE IMAGE to access this list and others and download for free!
ALL THINGS HOLIDAY
Clutter aside, let's move on to holiday decor and more! As an interior decorator who naturally embraces many principles of home organizers, Samara suggests that in decorating for the holidays and preparing for guests you think about all five senses.
“Often people think about what the room looks like, and what the menu will taste like, but what about touch? Cozy blankets and that feeling of warmth around you can be so inviting. As for sound, music sets the tone, ranging from upbeat and playful to quiet and calming, and helps you to transition through an event, too. And smell can go beyond your menu. Keep a pot of simmering mulled cider on the stovetop to evoke memories and warmth. And use cloves and cinnamon sticks to fill a decorative vase.”
Samara also favors natural decorations that are compostable, inexpensive, and reusable. You can check out ideas from her here. A simple glass hurricane with a white pillar candle can be filled with red and green candies during the winter holidays, sand and shells in the summer, and acorns or lentils in the fall. Likewise, you do not need a Christmas bowl. An elegant neutral bowl of clear glass, bronze or silver, or smooth wood can grace your home during any season or occasion. Just add festive ornaments at Christmas and enjoy!
Iconic gingerbread houses offer instant, homemade, and compostable decor! CLICK THE IMAGE to view this Artifcted house.
GUESTS WHO WILL SPEND ONE NIGHT OR MORE
If guests are coming to stay, you can easily discover online list upon list of items that you may want to have out and about to make your guests feel at home. Some things are small and easily done if you think of it, such as a small sign with your wi-fi password in a high traffic location as well as by their bedside.
Other things you maybe already have and/or do by routine anyway. Our favorites:
Laying out a sleep mask in case the sleep space is brighter than in their home
Providing a fan or sound machine in their bedroom
Clearing closet space and adding spare hangers along with a luggage rack
Placing a carafe or similar for water in their bedroom
Topping up or replacing basic toiletries
C. Lee also suggests repurposing wine glass tags for regular coffee mugs and glasses to avoid stress and confusion as to which glass belongs to which guest (and reduce dishes). And we also love her suggestion to leave out a note along with some plates/bowls, breakfast foods, and coffee/tea directions so that they can help themselves when they wake up and you can relax into your day.
A breakfast treat like coffee cake can be made ahead (even well ahead and frozen), and pulled out for all to enjoy at whatever hour they roll out of bed!
It's Okay to Control the Chaos When Guests are Staying
About those guests of yours: Keep your eye on the prize. Priorities shift when guests are in the house. Do you feel more like, "Your home, your rules?" Maybe treat your rules more like guidelines.
Set boundaries only where necessary to keep everyone (pets included) safe and to preserve your sanity. We’re willing to wager that more often than not your friends and family will follow along if they know your boundaries and general modes of operation. Just give them a nudge! For example, add a temporary over-the-door rack to hang multiple coats so people know where they can store coats and bags if you don’t want them strewn about. And if you are a shoe-free household, post a little sign and offer skid free socks to put on for their comfort and safety.
Guests are gone? Now is when you can reset and return things to normal around the house. Do not try to do this while they are there; it’s like fighting gravity. Is that really how you want to expend your energy while they are there and you’re trying to enjoy time together?
Tips for Making the 11th Hour Less Stressful
Remember that spreadsheet? We mentioned sorting it by weeks. Well, you may also want to create a timetable for the day of your event, says C. Lee, so you and everyone else remembers/knows when each thing needs to happen. When does each dish need to go in the oven? When will you light the candles and start the music? Who is arriving and when?
And what are old school sticky notes good for when it comes to the holidays? Delegation! Jill reminded us all to ask for and accept help. And even if you truly have it under control, you can appreciate that you’ll have folks joining the festivities who will feel more comfortable if they can help in some way.
Pop a sticky note next to the salad bowl, ingredients, and recipe, and say, “Make me!” Or add a note next to the stack of plates, flatware, and glasses and, write “Ready for the table.” If you coordinated in advance or simply know who will want which task, label the note with their name.
Samara encourages you to work ahead to set the table, which can be a serious effort depending on the number of place settings, the distance your table is from where all the essentials are stored, and how many layers of decorations, flatware and glasses, and more you add to complete the table.
“And if you don’t have a separate table you can decorate in advance, create a table setting box with everything you’ll need, including the tablecloth, napkins, candles, candle sticks. For items you can’t put in the box, like place settings, platters and glasses, make a list and add to the box to check off as you set the table.”
One more 11th hour prep tip is about gift opening. Have your helper tools stationed and ready. This might mean a bag for ribbons (to reuse) and another bag for non-recyclable wrapping and tissue papers. And to avoid losing anything in that holiday mess, have a box set out where small gifts can be popped into temporarily. Oh, and don’t forget to have a safety cutter on hand for eager gift receivers to open tough tape, boxes, and plastic covers without landing in the emergency room.
The Final Word
We asked our panelists for their final few words of advice to avoid getting our tinsel in a tangle. Here’s what they offered:
Simplify hostess gifts by picking one item to give to each hostess that season. Avoid more ‘stuff’ and go with consumables like wine, an evergreen potted plant, or special gourmet treats.
Which leads to… embrace regifting! If it’s a distinctive and memorable gift, perhaps just avoid regifting it inside the same circle of friends or colleagues to avoid awkward moments.
Centerpieces can be created well ahead of time and even done as an event, together with friends and family, for an instant tradition!
Minimize how much new you take on during the holiday season: one new decoration, one new recipe, one new tradition.
Plan in downtime so you can enjoy the season without being drained by it.
At the time, we were all emerging from our post-COVID days (or maybe even daze) trying to re-imagine what Thanksgiving may be like with limited travel and mask-optional gatherings. Fast forward to 2024 and a record number of Americans are expected to take to the roads, skies, and rails this Thanksgiving week to visit friends and family near and far.
And, thus, as you are finishing your shopping and moving on to the kitchen prep, we’re encouraged to ask you anew: What would it simply not be Thanksgiving without for you?
It Wouldn’t Be Thanksgiving Without...
While in our household, it wouldn’t be Thanksgiving without my mother’s tea breads, and in particular her banana bread, our list of what makes the Thanksgiving cut has grown over the past three years.
New to the list? The roasted heirloom carrots that first adorned our Thanksgiving table in 2022. Our youngest was adamant that we make a batch the week before Thanksgiving “just to test things out,” and our family who is hosting this year has already asked us to come with carrots in hand. And before you ask, yes, we checked, and these carrots are not part of the massive recall by the US Food and Drug Administration. Have you checked yours?
Another new(er) addition is Mom’s Cranberry Sauce, although it was always a staple for me, even if my siblings didn’t have a taste for it. Now that our crew has grown, and palates have matured, the cranberry sauce is a much sought-after item, possibly tying the bread stuffing for second place in the Thanksgiving sides hall of fame.
And although it is not a culinary creation per se, Grandmom’s China now adorns our Thanksgiving table. It wouldn’t be Thanksgiving (or really, any holiday!) without her world-traveling china. I love the china not just because of the pattern, but because of the stories behind it; Grandmom’s story and now our story, too.
Artifcts Circles: Organize and Share Those Memories
As our kids have grown, and our guest list has expanded to include family overseas, I’ve started to use Artifcts to organize and share our holiday adventures. The last year I hosted Thanksgiving for our motley crew, I created an Artifcts Circle to record and share not only the recipes and important “how-to” tips, but also the stories and memories behind the actual day, because let’s face it, sometimes as host(ess) it’s easy to overlook the small moments when trying to get a 25-pound turkey on the table on time.
Having created the Circle back in 2022, I’ve been able to refer to it year after year. I’ll check the Circle the week before to quickly make sure I’ve got all the ingredients I need for all our favorite recipes. Pulling out every last cookbook to find the various recipes is never tops on anyone’s list.
And if the kids or other family members ask for a specific recipe, no problem! With a single click I can send them the Artifct, with the recipe, notes, and even a short how-to video included. A small miracle when you’re trying to juggle a holiday meal for 12.
Intrigued? Click the image below to view a short video about how to create an Artifcts Circle and invite others to join in on the fun!
In closing, I invite you, Dear Reader, to join me in Artifcting your favorite family recipes this holiday season. Keep the traditions alive and share the love (or at least the banana bread).
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