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Letting Go of Sentimental Items

March 13, 2024

Reading time: 8 minutes 

Last fall Chris Stapleton appeared in a Sunday morning interview on NBC with Willie Geist. In a moment reflecting on the “how” of his music making, Chris pointed to a chair he’s used as he’s recorded all of his albums and said, “It’s home.” 

We get sentimental about objects for that “home” feeling among other reasons, making it difficult to let go sometimes. These are the artifacts of our lives! Today, we’re sharing our green-yellow-red light approach to reevaluating your sentimental collections. 

But, Reader, beware! If you are waiting for us to say, “Just take a picture of the item you want to remember,” this is not the article for you.  

In this digital age, we accumulate photos as fast as dishes in the kitchen waiting to be washed. Each photo you take and let slip 100s and 1000s back in your camera roll, even if filed into a folder, is a missed opportunity. You could have captured what’s so meaningful about it while the details were fresh. You could have shared it with someone to connect over a shared memory. So, please, take the photo, we agree, but in the next moment or same day, Artifct that. Okay, now on with today’s article! 

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Letting Go Can Be Really Hard. Full stop. 

When it comes to letting go of objects of sentimental value, some of us manage better than others. Some of us do not even consider ourselves sentimental and regularly “trim the fat.” The rest of us need all the help we can get.  

Our reasons and motivations for letting go of items vary: 

      • You’re downsizing and truly can’t keep it all.
      • You’re mindful that you have a lot of stuff and do not want to burden your family someday with figuring out what to do with it all.
      • You’re going through a decluttering process, because it’s beginning to feel like your walls are closing in on you. Psst ... A real or pretend household move can be a very effective motivator to declutter – less to pack and less to pay to move, too! 

As we set out to learn existing strategies for letting go of sentimental items, we canvassed the literature, decluttering blogs and videos, and more than a dozen books on the subjects. While the examples and stories differed, along with the viewpoints (scientific, minimalist, Christian, you name it!), it felt like there wasn’t much separating one approach from another. We distilled our learnings into a green-yellow-red light process for you to consider, “What do I want to do with this ‘thing?’” 

First, Why DO People Keep Sentimental Items? 

The answer to this question is especially important for all of us with someone in our life who we think is particularly sentimental, and we just can’t relate. Some of the most common reasons we found for people keeping items of emotional value that you should keep in mind include: 

      • The item was important to someone else who you loved or respected.
      • It makes you happy to have it, usually because of a memory it evokes.
      • You’ve had it a long time and it would feel strange to get rid of it. This is related to a concept called the “endowment effect.” If we own it, it has more value.
      • It’s the “last” of something or otherwise rare, or at least you think it is. This could also lead to a slippery slope of expectation that it has monetary value, too, today or “someday.” 
      • Emotional security – knowing it’s there makes you feel better.
      • Just because. Yes, that’s it. Let’s call this, “It’s in the eye of the beholder.” 

Letting Go of Sentimental Items: Green-Yellow-Red Light 

If you have spent time with an elementary school aged child during the last decade, you may have heard of this green-yellow-red approach to teaching kids about the spectrum of foods and their value to our bodies. Green foods are “go foods,” and you should enjoy them every day as you wish because they are so good for you. Yellow foods are “whoa foods,” and should be enjoyed in moderation. Red foods are those for which you should stop before putting in your mouth and consider a better option. They are not good for your body.  

The beauty of this framework is its dual simplicity and flexibility. Today we’re applying a green-yellow-red light framework to help you to parse through your belongings and just maybe let go of a few.  

It’s important to emphasize that systems like these must be adapted to personal starting points and circumstances. Hoarding disorders, grief, and other situations may require different approaches, ranging from professional support to grace and space. 

Green items: Keep, enjoy, display. Clearly this stuff matters! This might be the stuff you re-clutter with after you clear out the rest. 

Yellow items: Reconsider. Maybe there’s a better home or opportunity to repurpose some of these items. 

Red items: Halt: declutter! Red light items often have an overwhelming number of items in the same category or have had no use or value to you for years, making them ripe for thinning out over time. Remember, it does not have to be all at once! 

Here are illustrative examples from each category to help you prioritize as you let go of sentimental items. 

GREEN LIGHT – Give yourself a pass.

  • It absolutely adds value to your life, brings you joy or peace, or some other benefit. You don’t have to justify this feeling. (Remember our recent ARTIcles story, “We all deserve a Purple Bin!”) You’ll know it reflexively when you look at the item. This is a category of items that may have already been pared back, for example, if you kept only a few items that belonged to your spouse who passed. 
  • You use or display & enjoy it and have no need to replace or change. 
  • It is financially valuable, too. Do not pinch pennies here. It’s valuable and you are going to keep it because it’s doing no harm, and you would only get rid of it if you sold it. (Check out our ARTIcles story, From Rare Art to Family Heirlooms: Tips From a Master as You Consider Selling Your 'Stuff.') When you Artifct it, be sure to attach the receipt, appraisal, and or certificate of authenticity in the ‘Documentation’ section and as many details as possible, potentially including how and where you got it (provenance), dimensions, weight, and any signatures or maker’s mark(s). Bonus: Use Artifcts’ “What’s it worth?” button if you are curious about the item’s current market valuation.  
  • If a family vote were taken, the majority would say, "Keep!” We have this broken pair of Rudolph glasses. I wanted to buy a new pair and was strongly vetoed. These glasses have been with us a long time, and my family found a new way to use them in their broken state. 

YELLOW LIGHT – It might be time to go. 

  • Books. You might be surprised to reread “favorites” of yours only to discover they are favorites no longer. Your tastes shift. Books are a good category of objects to pause on and really consider whether you need each one. I’ll never get rid of my copy of Rooftops of Tehran. Even if I don’t love it one day, I remember the impact it had on me when I first read it. It stays. But recently I did reread some “critically acclaimed” books I remember enjoying and have moved with me several times, but they didn’t make the cut this time. I donated them. 
  • Battletested and/or antique kitchenware. How much of Grandma’s old cookware do you need to keep to remember what an amazing cook she was or how much you loved to cook with her or the smell of her bread in the oven? And if you are actually using it, consider if it is still safe to use. Can you reduce what you’ve kept to a few representative pieces? Maybe even retire some to become fun décor. 
  • Special textiles. Table linens, children's clothing and costumes, loved blankets, this is another area that’s easy to accumulate and squish just a bit more into that shelf or bin. And being practical, too, it’s easier to quickly try and give it a pass. If it’s all getting used, well, then that makes sense, unless of course you’re running out of space. Plus, linens tend to age without you truly SEEING the signs of age (stains, yellowing, fraying edges …). Use season changes to reconsider and maybe even “treat” yourself to something new to replace some you are letting go of. 

RED LIGHT – Some of these items need to go.  

  • Boxes and boxes of items from a loved one who has passed. It’s taking up space somewhere, and to what end? If you're ready, pick out only those items that truly resonate with you. Consider who else could want it and benefit from the rest or open it up, video it, and send to family to give them a chance to make a claim.  
  • Relics of a former career, student or professional. Do you have college notebooks and textbooks from decades ago. Why? What about awards and mementos? Others are very unlikely to really understand what if any of this matters either if you haven’t told them the stories (or better yet, Artifcted them.) I was really proud of an econometric study I did in graduate school in large part because of the note the professor wrote on the final copy. I don’t know compelled me to keep the physical copy for decades, but I can tell you now that it’s Artifcted, I finally recycled it. 
  • Kid clutter. This is the artwork, awards, presents and so much more that multiplies like bunny rabbits inside closets, under beds, and in what was once a previously (momentarily?) organized and functional system of bins. It is absolutely fair game to put this category into a regular decluttering rotation with your child(ren). Why? It is especially vulnerable to you forgetting what it was and why you and your kids kept it anyway because of the sheer volume. Be careful in this category not to go overboard. Consider our learnings shared in, “Before You Thin Out That Stuffed Animal Collection, Consider What Scientists Have to Say.”  

A Parting Story and Message to Consider 

When our co-founder Ellen Goodwin (@egoody) traveled to Arizona to Artifct with her 97-year-old great aunt, what stood out were the things her aunt had chosen to keep as she came to the end of her lifetime and the stories they told. Having downsized to so very little, chief among the items her great aunt wanted Ellen to see were a pair of goggles, a brochure, and a testing piece she used to become certified to weld airplanes during WWII. Check out #MurielsStories 

What matters to us all, what TRULY matters, shifts over time. Do not feel pressured to move too fast to declutter and/or downsize unless life circumstances give you no real choice in the matter. Even then, please remember to take a moment to smell the roses and remember the value of what you have and, sometimes, the emotional and practical (less to dust!) value of letting go. 

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© 2024 Artifcts, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

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So Much 'Stuff:' How They Suck Us In and How We Can Resist!

Careful what you ask for. In his book “Stuffocation,” author James Wallman details how in the post-industrial revolution US economy of the 1920s and 1930s, there was too much of everything, everything produced by farmers to industrial machines. We overachieved! Rather than produce less, the goal became getting consumers to buy more, even if they had enough. Advertisers had to up their games.

The trick was how to get people to lose the “lasts a lifetime” expectation and develop a desire for the newest version, model, or edition that industry was now only too happy to churn out. The fashion industry already exemplified this and now the rest had to catch on, landfills be damned, and provide cheaper, disposable, fashionable everything. 

Fast forward 100 years and the "buy more" concept has persisted and matured, leaving no industry untouched. Here are a few examples to get you thinking like the advertisers do. 

GADGETS.

Millions regularly trade in their favorite gadget—whether a phone, tv, fitness tracker, or otherwise—for the next model the moment it’s released, waiting in line to ensure they are the earliest of adopters. And tech's just the obvious example.  

COLORS!

Have you thought about why there are “colors of the year” and “of the season” that pop up in your feeds and inboxes, often with seasonally suggestive names, like “breezy blue?” All the companies fall in line with their similar version of the “it” blue of the season, until it’s suddenly a beautiful gem green and yet again you rethink your clothing and home decor choices. 

DESIGN CONCEPTS.

Design concepts trend just like colors. Recently “glaze” has popped up on hot pink garments from Lulu Lemon and green frames from Framebridge. This is not to be outdone by “scalloped” edges on picture frames from Archival Methods, mirrors and tables from School House, and toilet paper from Charmin. Product and marketing experts know how to get modern buyers to buy. 

MATCHING SETS AND COMPOSITIONS.

Here’s yet another reason to buy – sets. Whether that’s a matching clothing set or a gallery wall of frames, moving you to buy not one, not a set, but MORE all at once. I mean, the picture shows 10 frames make a gallery, so I guess I need one of each, right? 

Maybe these tactics do not sway you. You have a certain style, and you stick to it. Timeless. Functional. You! What about ...

ENTICING DISCOUNTS.

... the sneaky “up to 30%” off offers? Have you fallen for those? You browse or click and nearly nothing you’re interested in is 30% off, just a tactically chosen few which you overlook as you accelerate through the checkout process because you are already there in the store or your credit card or other digital payment means is already available on your phone or laptop. 

6 Strategies to Help You Muffle the Calls to Buy

In honor of Earth Day that was celebrated on Monday, and in recognition of our general philosophy here at Artifcts that you should stop and smell the roses more often when it comes to your ‘stuff’ to appreciate what you have and why you have it, we’ve curated some easy tactics you can use to halt more stuff from coming into your home.

1. Unsubscribe. (Yes, catalogs, too. Check out options). Have you heard of that movie from 80s, "See No Evil, Hear No Evil?" That's the idea. If you are not seeing those emails and notifications, you are so far ahead of the game. Worried you’ll miss a sale? Set a reminder to check back when you know they usually have sales. Or simply sign up again later if you truly miss seeing their emails. 

2. Delete payment methods. Unless you are on a recurring payment plan that requires a purchase, delete and/or do not save any payment information anywhere. Make it inconvenient to make that purchase. You’ll have to get up out of your seat to get that credit card, giving you time to think again. 

3. Work ahead for sales. You’re a deal hunter. Fabulous. So are we. Save items to your shopping cart weeks before that next big sale. In the US, big sales are like clockwork on major holidays. By preloading items to your cart, you have time to think on it. When you return weeks later you might discover that at least some of those items are not as “must have” as you first thought. 

4. Visualize where it will go, where and when you will wear it. Maybe you love a beautiful, framed picture, a side table, a cool clock, a dazzling watch, or a “travels-beautifully” dress. Pause to think, where exactly will I hang this picture in my home? Where will this table fit? You already have a watch. Why do you need or want this one? 

5. Keep savings goals front and center. Do you have debt to pay down? A big trip you’re dreaming about? What about ambitions for a lower stress summer with the kids in camps they’ll love? Keep photos of your goals around you. Track your savings each week. Or add to your savings each time you resist a purchase as a reward toward your goal, even if it’s only skipping that espresso. Whatever it takes for you, remember the thrill of that purchase might be short-lived compared to your still more thrilling goals. 

6. Skip “{fill in the blank} math.” Here’s a recent example of this straight from our teenage daughters and their talk about “girl math.” Normally the swim tops and bottoms are individually $30 but there’s a buy one-get one sale. Dear daughter picked out a swim set and said, “Awesome, I have $30 more dollars to spend.” On something, anything, no idea what, but let’s go spend! Sigh.

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We feel better already, reminding ourselves of these strategies. We're not turning over a minimalist leaf or shaming anyone for enjoying a bit of shopping. But we do hope your buying does not lessen anything else in your life, from enjoying your home to taking those trips of a lifetime you save for and remember always.

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© 2024 Artifcts, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

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Going Green. With Artifcts. 2024 Edition

We’re back with the 2nd edition of our “Going Green. With Artifcts.” guide to celebrate Earth Day 2024. If you missed our 1st edition, download it here.

What makes our guide unique is its focus on items with potential sentimental value. What to do with those ‘things’ that have a story, memory, or special moment behind them but have outlived their useful life-span (to you!). We recommend you Artifct the items and their stories before you let them go. 

Partial view of the Going Green with Artifcts guide

 
 
Click the image to download your copy. And use the hyperlinks in the guide to learn more.

That means we do not usually cover plastic servingwear, leftover building supplies, unused paints and the like. It is true that you might struggle to part with a box of acrylic paints that belonged to your brother who was an artist. And yes, that could make for an amazing Artifct when paired with a story about him and photos of his artistic works. But we’ve tried to feature items we know have been Artifcted many times over and may also be in need of a green-friendly next life.

Surprise Inside Our Guide

We were delighted to include two companies whose founders we have met over the course of building Artifcts. One is Ephemera Search and is well-known in genealogy circles for the unique value it brings to family history research through postcards, telegrams, and letters. The other is the LooseEnds Project, a non-profit bringing the power of volunteers at a global scale to complete textiles projects our loved ones were unable to finish.  

This year’s guide also includes a nod to Artifcts®’ new partnership with Susan G. Komen®. During acute and chronic healthcare events alike, we tend to accumulate medical supplies that sometimes cost us a pretty penny even if we need them for only days, weeks, or months. Then what? We’ve found one resource specific to breast cancer to answer that question. 

We hope all the featured resources will help or inspire you as you keep the memories, not the stuff... and stay green friendly in the process!

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© 2024 Artifcts, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

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Swedish Death Cleaning Your Digital Legacy

Reading time: 7 minutes 

Swedish Death Cleaning provides a conceptual framework to encourage us each to organize and declutter our homes to reduce the burden on loved ones who would otherwise need to sift through 1000s of objects one day when we’re no longer here. We might be some of the biggest fans of Margareta Magnusson, who introduced the concept in her book, The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning, that she’s never met.💗 We all can understand and maybe even relate to the concept but having a term for it gives us a starting point to act on it! 

Artifcts is your best-in-class Swedish Death Cleaning app. It’s a big reason why we write on and provide workshops related to this topic. Today we’re considering Swedish Death Cleaning from yet another angle: Your digital legacy.

Defining “Digital Legacy” 

What ARE we talking about, “digital legacy?” 

Good question! Because, no, in this context, it is not about the entirety of your online life or digital assets, e.g. banking, mortgages, insurance policies, investments, or similar. All critical! All should be a part of your estate plan and/or will. You should also invest in an online digital vault to corral it together, benefit from automated and smart reminders, and enjoy the ease of sharing securely or accessing it yourself in an emergency.

Announcement for Digital Legacy Workshop from AfterLight

 
 
Take a deep dive! Our friends at AfterLight have a new workshop offering expert guidance on organizing and securing your digital estate. Register today.

What we are talking about with "digital legacy" are the digital items that reflect our lives and personal histories as well as who we are as members of families and communities. 

What makes up your digital legacy depends in part on your age as well as your personality and views. Some of us have chosen not to adopt certain aspects of digital life or have intentionally created the smallest digital footprint possible. Others of us go big online for personal and professional reasons. 

Below we’ll provide a framework to help you get started as you organize and maybe declutter your own digital legacy to ensure its best chance of meaning and survival!

What: Take Inventory 

Literally pause, grab a piece of paper or digital notebook, and start jotting down your digital footprint. Yes, you might need to wander your home, pull out some bins, open some drawers, but this is the easy part. We’ll help you get started. Do you or other household members have any of these? 

      • Digital music and/or movie libraries, including media that’s natively digital and any you might have digitized when you, oh, let’s say, “decluttered” that VHS, DVD, or CD collection. 
      • Photographs, again, digital native photos from your phone, most likely, and those pics you have scanned or otherwise digitized over time. 
      • Social media posts, and before those, your blogs 
      • Academic and professional research, including publications, patents, and even genealogy, family history, and DNA information.  
      • NFTs and other digital works stored, for example, in your digital wallet(s).

Where: As Tech has Changed, Storage has Changed 

Before cell phones were our go-to video recorders, there were small handheld versions that were wow’ing, because they had great quality and storage for the time, and were many times smaller than those you held with a strap in one hand or the ones that were so big that they sat on your shoulder. Did you ever download all the videos on your digital handheld camera? Treasures untold may be waiting. 

Think creatively through all the digital tech you’ve used and held onto through the years when you consider where your files may be resting, and in some cases, actively degrading. 

Bulk stashes via old and new hardware.

As time has gone on, we’ve been able to more cheaply and conveniently store massive volumes of data on those things and yet you might be surprised how little you actually saved to some. One of our Arti Community members told us she has 15 thumb drives that each contain three songs her daughter recorded during her spring and fall piano recitals.

Dig out those thumb drives, memory cards that may still be in old cameras or spare cases, disks (floppy, hard, and otherwise), and flash drives. Environmental implications aside, harvesting and storing those digital files together, and backed up in a second location, is a relatively easy, cheap, and fast undertaking. Hurray! 

Desktop and laptop hard drives. 

Hopefully before you donated or recycled old computers, you saved the contents somewhere else, a flash drive, your preferred cloud environment, or your new computer, perhaps. Wherever it went, take stock. And watch out if your employer is okay with you using your work device for personal use, too, as you may have some gems on those devices. 

“The Cloud,” e.g. Google Drive, Box, Drop Box, and Permanent, among others. 

You may have gotten on a kick and started storing stuff within a particular environment because a friend or family member was sharing stuff with you there and you followed suit. But what are you using nowadays? Consider if your habits have changed and you need to rescue files from various cloud locations and move to one central archive for storage. 

Memberships, especially apps and websites you love or loved once upon a time.

If you are worried you might not remember them all, you have some options.  

Option A. Checking billing statements is the best starting point. We hope you’re not paying for something you haven’t used in years. While simpler than scrolling through your email for pages, this still gets messy if you are using many different payment methods (credit cards, PayPal, etc.) and/or other household members might be paying via a family account. So, option B ...  

Option B. Go to the apps lists on your phone, tv, and computer. What’s installed? Are you paying for it? While you’re in there, check which have location, contact, notification, and background refresh services turned on. You might want to lock down your privacy! Bonus Tip: For Apple (iOS) mobile users, you can go to your Settings -> Click on your name/circle at the top -> and click “Subscriptions.” You may find surprises there, too! 

Take a moment to consider first what content do (or did) you create or upload to these memberships that you own and can potentially download to back up elsewhere and/or to then close your account. Then, if you want to keep the account open and have backed up the content, check the account’s settings for legacy contact and/or memorialization options and set yours up so you do not lose anything you created or upload to that membership. You also will then hoepfully avoid falling into a scenario in which inactivity grants the company via its terms and conditions the right to delete your data or use your data in a way you do not support.

Best Practice call out box

Now What: What Do You Value Most? What Do “They” Value Most? 

Life comes with inherent limits. Only so much time in a day, money in our accounts, bandwidth in our brains. We must choose carefully how we spend our resources. What matters to you will help you prioritize how you manage your digital legacy. 

Here are three steps you can take to manage your digital legacy. These are not mutually exclusive! Start at ‘good,’ add in ‘better,’ and laugh, enjoy, and gain peace of mind with ‘best.’

Good. Inventory the items and put physical storage devices, e.g. flash drives, in a fire-safe place. Get rid of what you don’t want. This might mean recycling some tech (options exist!) and cleaning out files. But before you get too aggressive with that decluttering, ASK loved ones if they are interested in the types of materials you are ready to shed. You may be surprised what matters to them versus to yourself! This will help you with the next option.

Better. Digitize items with backups and share access to those resources with loved ones. This is now moving into prime Swedish Death Cleaning territory where we have not just organized but we’ve also decluttered in a way that’s potentially meaningful. Loved ones get the option to raise their hand and say, “Yes, that I want.” And the beauty here is it is digital. It won’t take up physical space so it’s less risky for them to say yes.

Best. While we all love photos, videos, and documentary evidence of cool things, like being the mastermind behind a patent, without context, even digital items become clutter we ignore. Here’s the story of one family’s “great” discovery. Whether your format is Artifcts, scrapbooks, or photobooks, find a medium to gift your loved ones a ‘why’ and not just more digital stuff. What is the story behind this photo? In layman's speak, what was this amazing scientific breakthrough in this patent that bears your name? What did it mean to you

Let us know about your progress. What was the easy part? Are you stuck on any specific digital histories of yours? What was the outcome? 

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More from Artifcts on Swedish Death Cleaning: 

The Joys of Swedish Death Cleaning 

Swedish Death Cleaning a Marriage After Death or Divorce 

How Swedish Death Cleaning Helps During a Move

© 2024 Artifcts, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

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