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Letting Go of Sentimental Items

March 13, 2024

Reading time: 8 minutes 

Last fall Chris Stapleton appeared in a Sunday morning interview on NBC with Willie Geist. In a moment reflecting on the “how” of his music making, Chris pointed to a chair he’s used as he’s recorded all of his albums and said, “It’s home.” 

We get sentimental about objects for that “home” feeling among other reasons, making it difficult to let go sometimes. These are the artifacts of our lives! Today, we’re sharing our green-yellow-red light approach to reevaluating your sentimental collections. 

But, Reader, beware! If you are waiting for us to say, “Just take a picture of the item you want to remember,” this is not the article for you.  

In this digital age, we accumulate photos as fast as dishes in the kitchen waiting to be washed. Each photo you take and let slip 100s and 1000s back in your camera roll, even if filed into a folder, is a missed opportunity. You could have captured what’s so meaningful about it while the details were fresh. You could have shared it with someone to connect over a shared memory. So, please, take the photo, we agree, but in the next moment or same day, Artifct that. Okay, now on with today’s article! 

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Letting Go Can Be Really Hard. Full stop. 

When it comes to letting go of objects of sentimental value, some of us manage better than others. Some of us do not even consider ourselves sentimental and regularly “trim the fat.” The rest of us need all the help we can get.  

Our reasons and motivations for letting go of items vary: 

      • You’re downsizing and truly can’t keep it all.
      • You’re mindful that you have a lot of stuff and do not want to burden your family someday with figuring out what to do with it all.
      • You’re going through a decluttering process, because it’s beginning to feel like your walls are closing in on you. Psst ... A real or pretend household move can be a very effective motivator to declutter – less to pack and less to pay to move, too! 

As we set out to learn existing strategies for letting go of sentimental items, we canvassed the literature, decluttering blogs and videos, and more than a dozen books on the subjects. While the examples and stories differed, along with the viewpoints (scientific, minimalist, Christian, you name it!), it felt like there wasn’t much separating one approach from another. We distilled our learnings into a green-yellow-red light process for you to consider, “What do I want to do with this ‘thing?’” 

First, Why DO People Keep Sentimental Items? 

The answer to this question is especially important for all of us with someone in our life who we think is particularly sentimental, and we just can’t relate. Some of the most common reasons we found for people keeping items of emotional value that you should keep in mind include: 

      • The item was important to someone else who you loved or respected.
      • It makes you happy to have it, usually because of a memory it evokes.
      • You’ve had it a long time and it would feel strange to get rid of it. This is related to a concept called the “endowment effect.” If we own it, it has more value.
      • It’s the “last” of something or otherwise rare, or at least you think it is. This could also lead to a slippery slope of expectation that it has monetary value, too, today or “someday.” 
      • Emotional security – knowing it’s there makes you feel better.
      • Just because. Yes, that’s it. Let’s call this, “It’s in the eye of the beholder.” 

Letting Go of Sentimental Items: Green-Yellow-Red Light 

If you have spent time with an elementary school aged child during the last decade, you may have heard of this green-yellow-red approach to teaching kids about the spectrum of foods and their value to our bodies. Green foods are “go foods,” and you should enjoy them every day as you wish because they are so good for you. Yellow foods are “whoa foods,” and should be enjoyed in moderation. Red foods are those for which you should stop before putting in your mouth and consider a better option. They are not good for your body.  

The beauty of this framework is its dual simplicity and flexibility. Today we’re applying a green-yellow-red light framework to help you to parse through your belongings and just maybe let go of a few.  

It’s important to emphasize that systems like these must be adapted to personal starting points and circumstances. Hoarding disorders, grief, and other situations may require different approaches, ranging from professional support to grace and space. 

Green items: Keep, enjoy, display. Clearly this stuff matters! This might be the stuff you re-clutter with after you clear out the rest. 

Yellow items: Reconsider. Maybe there’s a better home or opportunity to repurpose some of these items. 

Red items: Halt: declutter! Red light items often have an overwhelming number of items in the same category or have had no use or value to you for years, making them ripe for thinning out over time. Remember, it does not have to be all at once! 

Here are illustrative examples from each category to help you prioritize as you let go of sentimental items. 

GREEN LIGHT – Give yourself a pass.

  • It absolutely adds value to your life, brings you joy or peace, or some other benefit. You don’t have to justify this feeling. (Remember our recent ARTIcles story, “We all deserve a Purple Bin!”) You’ll know it reflexively when you look at the item. This is a category of items that may have already been pared back, for example, if you kept only a few items that belonged to your spouse who passed. 
  • You use or display & enjoy it and have no need to replace or change. 
  • It is financially valuable, too. Do not pinch pennies here. It’s valuable and you are going to keep it because it’s doing no harm, and you would only get rid of it if you sold it. (Check out our ARTIcles story, From Rare Art to Family Heirlooms: Tips From a Master as You Consider Selling Your 'Stuff.') When you Artifct it, be sure to attach the receipt, appraisal, and or certificate of authenticity in the ‘Documentation’ section and as many details as possible, potentially including how and where you got it (provenance), dimensions, weight, and any signatures or maker’s mark(s). Bonus: Use Artifcts’ “What’s it worth?” button if you are curious about the item’s current market valuation.  
  • If a family vote were taken, the majority would say, "Keep!” We have this broken pair of Rudolph glasses. I wanted to buy a new pair and was strongly vetoed. These glasses have been with us a long time, and my family found a new way to use them in their broken state. 

YELLOW LIGHT – It might be time to go. 

  • Books. You might be surprised to reread “favorites” of yours only to discover they are favorites no longer. Your tastes shift. Books are a good category of objects to pause on and really consider whether you need each one. I’ll never get rid of my copy of Rooftops of Tehran. Even if I don’t love it one day, I remember the impact it had on me when I first read it. It stays. But recently I did reread some “critically acclaimed” books I remember enjoying and have moved with me several times, but they didn’t make the cut this time. I donated them. 
  • Battletested and/or antique kitchenware. How much of Grandma’s old cookware do you need to keep to remember what an amazing cook she was or how much you loved to cook with her or the smell of her bread in the oven? And if you are actually using it, consider if it is still safe to use. Can you reduce what you’ve kept to a few representative pieces? Maybe even retire some to become fun décor. 
  • Special textiles. Table linens, children's clothing and costumes, loved blankets, this is another area that’s easy to accumulate and squish just a bit more into that shelf or bin. And being practical, too, it’s easier to quickly try and give it a pass. If it’s all getting used, well, then that makes sense, unless of course you’re running out of space. Plus, linens tend to age without you truly SEEING the signs of age (stains, yellowing, fraying edges …). Use season changes to reconsider and maybe even “treat” yourself to something new to replace some you are letting go of. 

RED LIGHT – Some of these items need to go.  

  • Boxes and boxes of items from a loved one who has passed. It’s taking up space somewhere, and to what end? If you're ready, pick out only those items that truly resonate with you. Consider who else could want it and benefit from the rest or open it up, video it, and send to family to give them a chance to make a claim.  
  • Relics of a former career, student or professional. Do you have college notebooks and textbooks from decades ago. Why? What about awards and mementos? Others are very unlikely to really understand what if any of this matters either if you haven’t told them the stories (or better yet, Artifcted them.) I was really proud of an econometric study I did in graduate school in large part because of the note the professor wrote on the final copy. I don’t know compelled me to keep the physical copy for decades, but I can tell you now that it’s Artifcted, I finally recycled it. 
  • Kid clutter. This is the artwork, awards, presents and so much more that multiplies like bunny rabbits inside closets, under beds, and in what was once a previously (momentarily?) organized and functional system of bins. It is absolutely fair game to put this category into a regular decluttering rotation with your child(ren). Why? It is especially vulnerable to you forgetting what it was and why you and your kids kept it anyway because of the sheer volume. Be careful in this category not to go overboard. Consider our learnings shared in, “Before You Thin Out That Stuffed Animal Collection, Consider What Scientists Have to Say.”  

A Parting Story and Message to Consider 

When our co-founder Ellen Goodwin (@egoody) traveled to Arizona to Artifct with her 97-year-old great aunt, what stood out were the things her aunt had chosen to keep as she came to the end of her lifetime and the stories they told. Having downsized to so very little, chief among the items her great aunt wanted Ellen to see were a pair of goggles, a brochure, and a testing piece she used to become certified to weld airplanes during WWII. Check out #MurielsStories 

What matters to us all, what TRULY matters, shifts over time. Do not feel pressured to move too fast to declutter and/or downsize unless life circumstances give you no real choice in the matter. Even then, please remember to take a moment to smell the roses and remember the value of what you have and, sometimes, the emotional and practical (less to dust!) value of letting go. 

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© 2024 Artifcts, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

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Three Peas in a Pod: Sports, Stuff, & Stories

If you are a parent, a friend of a parent, neighbor of a parent, or contemplating parenthood, you've probably noticed that sports consume a vast amount of time & energy for parents and child athletes alike not to mention money and storage space for all that gear. And then, they get older, and the equipment larger and more expensive.  

We’ve found ways to cope and find the humor in this sporting reality. Surely you've seen bumper stickers like "swim taxi" or heard someone say, "I'll be working from my {barn} office," as Artifcts Co-founder Heather Nickerson often quips as she departs for her daughter's horse riding lessons. 

You may already be using Artifcts as your top ally in keeping track of the key moments, good luck tokens, awards, gear, and other memorabilia you can't (yet?) part with.  

broken baseball cleat without laces    child in hockey jersey and gear standing outside an indoor rink

Click the image to view the baseball cleat or hockey jersey.
 
 
The owners tell us neither of these has been given up (yet)!

Inside the World of Swimming 'Stuff'

Today we're focusing on that last bit, the hall of fame worthy gear, but not from a parent. We're pivoting to the sport of swimming and the Texas Swimming & Diving Hall of Fame.

Charles Logan spent the better part of 12 years as the Director of the Lee and Joe Jamail Texas Swimming Center at The University of Texas at Austin. And lucky for all who enjoy the phenomenal Olympic-level center, Logan has long had a passion for collecting swim memorabilia. Much of his collection now resides in frames, glass display cases, and special exhibits at the Texas Swimming & Diving Hall of Fame, with notable contributions from Texas athletes and their families. 

Picture of an old postcard with a caricature of a swimmer on the front

 
 
 
 
This Artifct is part of a private swim memorabilia collection. Click the image to view the Artifct.

To clarify, the stuff resides at the Hall of Fame; until very recently, the stories did not.

Those stories were locked in Charles' memories of a lifetime of collecting and chasing histories. That of course meant that when massive crowds visit the facility for NCAA competitions and championships, Olympic qualifying events, and regular long and short course seasons (not to mention hours and hours and hours of practice) the swim memorabilia left people to wonder, "What is this?” “Why is it here?" and “How does it all connect?” And for all those who never visit the Hall of Fame in person, it’s simply lost history. 

Joining forces with Artifcts, the 'stuff' now has stories and is ready and waiting to inform and entertain Hall of Fame visitors and maybe even inspire a whole new generation of swimmers. We invite you to a virtual tour of some of those exhibits on Artifcts! 

black swimsuit with white T on it  Vintage USA Olympic Swim Team Luggage, bag and suitcase    vintage swim patch collection on a swim jacket

 
 

And if you're visiting the Texas Swimming & Diving Hall of Fame, be on the look out for Aritfcts QR codes sprinkled throughout!  

Artifcts QR code on a swim mannequin

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Have a space in your life like the Texas Swimming & Diving Hall of Fame making you say, "Hmmm?" Contact us at Hello@Artifcts.com to discuss personal concierge options and non-profit and enterprise support. 

© 2022-2024 Artifcts, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

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How a Simple Act Saved One Man’s Most Valued Memory of His Dad

His father was an advertising executive back in the 70s and 80s. Think Mad Men style. He was a bit of a wild man, a creative entrepreneurial sort that had a habit of building and losing fortunes, hustling, taking risks, and living and loving life.  

When he won the contract to shoot a Tiffany & Co. catalog, he was on the spot. He had to deliver on everything from art directing to photography on a dime to get the stunning results Tiffany & Co. expected. When time came for payment, his eye was not on a cash payout that his family needed but instead on a trade: Services rendered for a single Tiffany ring. And the good folks at Tiffany & Co. obliged. 

The Onyyx Stone Vintage Signate ring set in a simple 14k gold band is eye catching. It’s a manly ring. Bold in its simplicity. His Dad wore it everywhere.   

Matt and his father; his father's wearing the black onyx ring

Many years later, on his death bed, he gave this ring to his son Matt to carry a piece of him and his spirit forward. It’s the sort of dramatic gesture you usually only see in the movies.  

Like his dad, Matt wore the ring every day, everywhere, an omnipresent touchstone to his roots.

Then one day, Matt took it off. Out one evening for a dinner meeting in Cincinnati, Ohio, Matt removed the ring, placing it in his pocket, to avoid a potential mess while enjoying an exceptionally juicy burger at his favorite local restaurant.

Only later when Matt returned to his hotel room did he realize the ring was missing. No hole in his pocket, but no ring either.

What Happened Next 

What do you do when you lose something?

You retrace your steps.

You picture what you’ve lost, and you try to describe it to those who might help you find it.

You hunt through photos on your phone hoping to find one that shows the ring clearly. But come to think of it, how often do you take a photo that clearly shows a ring you wear unless you’re newly engaged? 

Matt was lucky. He may have had the stress of this lost family heirloom, but he did not have the stress of how to describe this invaluable piece of his father. Matt had Artifcted that ring.

 
CLICK THE IMAGE to view the Artifct and listen to Matt tell you about his father and the ring in his own words.

Artifcts to the Rescue

After Matt discovered he’d lost the ring, he did two things next: 

      1. He shared the Artifct with his insurance company. His Artifct of the ring included photos with the ring clearly pictured along with the story of its provenance. This is every insurer’s dream. Instant notice from a client of a lost item, multiple photos of the item, and details about its provenance. Far fewer emails and calls back and forth to process the claim, less concern about fraud, and a lower stress, more likely to be satisfied, policyholder. 
      2. He shared the Artifct with the restaurant where he had taken it off. The restaurant owner shared the ring photos with his staff to begin the search. Not everyone can easily imagine a ring generically described. Photos help.

Two days later

The restaurant staff came through. They found Matt’s ring in two days later in the parking lot. Dented a little but found! Matt raced back to the restaurant hours before his flight home to recover his father’s ring.  

Matt then shared the Artifcted ring a third time. This time he shared it with a local jeweler in hopes that the ring could be restored to its former glory. Spoiler: It’s good as new!

If You Love It, Artifct That! 

There's simply, truly, we beg you to understand, no time like the present.

We share this story with Matt’s permission as further evidence of how taking all of one minute to create Artifcts for items that you value most in this life can have many returns to you in the future.  

This was never just a ring. This is the ring his father gave him. This is the ring that belonged to the man that Matt wanted to keep alive for his own children to know. This is the man whose actions taught Matt that you must always get paid for the work you do.

This story is not about the ring, not really. It’s about a wild man, a creative, a hopeless entrepreneur and the life lessons he passed to his son, and that his son now will pass to his children.

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© 2024 Artifcts, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

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Every Room Has a Story: Closet Edition

Reading time: 7 minutes 

You may be surprised, but in the world of tough ‘stuff’ to sort through, declutter, and organize, for many of us our closets top the list. Call it what you want, but we’ve learned that along with the many stories and memories those closets hold, closets can store a lot of trauma inside, too.  

Think about the bedroom closet alone. We pack in the past lives we lived in those clothes, past versions of ourselves that fit into those clothes, and cherished pieces and memento boxes that tie us to places or times we want to remember. Maybe we even stash and store the same for loved ones who have passed or kiddos we’ve raised. 

As you surely have guessed by now, in this edition of ARTIcles by Artifcts, we’re closing out our “Every Room Has a Story” series with a focus on your closets. 

Catch up on past editions in the series: Living Room |  Kids’ Rooms Bathroom | Kitchen

A Walk Back in Time: The Red Coat

More than 50 years ago, a young college student in Chicago met the man she was going to marry through mutual friends, as is so often the case. She had one of those personalities that exuded light and energy and attracted people to her. And if that weren’t enough, she boldly wore a brilliant red, full-length, heavy wool coat to counter the long and sometimes gray and dreary Chicago winters. Hard to miss! 

A long red wool coat with large silver buttons

 
 
What's your "red coat," that item in your closet you just can't part with even if you'll never wear it again?

Fast forward to the present day.  

The woman’s husband and one of her grown daughters are in the former master bedroom on the second story of the family home. Even though the new master bedroom on the first floor has been in use for at least 10 years and boasts a beautiful custom closet and dressing area, the old walk-in master closet is still brimming with clothing, old suitcases, and more.  

Hemming and hawing over how to tackle this ‘stuff’ in preparation for a future downsizing move, the woman’s husband spots the red coat. “Oh, you have to take this to your mother.” 

With a quizzical look, the daughter grabs the coat and heads downstairs to her mother. 

“My red coat! Where did you find it?” the mom says, as though she just misplaced it yesterday, when in fact the daughter had never in her 40+ years of life seen the coat. And with good reason, too. The coat, clearly of high quality, had stains and moth holes that suggest it should be retired.  

“You know, I wore that coat when I was in college. Your dad could spot me across campus,” said the mother. “It was fun to be the ‘gal in the red coat.’” 

You see, that coat was a part of a moment in time when their love story was unfolding. It was as fresh in the woman’s mind as anything she’d worn since. She had no interest in downsizing this coat, even after decades of disuse. Despite its bulk and condition, it would be making the future move. 

Stories & Your Closet 

If you want to embrace feng sui concepts of harmony and balance, closets are an intuitive space to start, partly because closets are so prone to chaos. Closets often come with doors, too, allowing us to ignore the chaos for another day. Sorting like with like, using matching sets of hangers and storage boxes, arranging shoes in the same front facing fashion, and the like, are the simplest means to diminish the chaos. But if you truly want to declutter, never mind downsize, recognizing and honoring the stories within, we’d argue, is a critical second. 

1. The ‘Why’ of the Clothing We Keep.

We’re talking specifically about clothing you’ll never wear again. It’s one of our spring-cleaning themes and top targets for decluttering. You know it’s there, even if hidden, the clothing you should recycle or donate. We’re looking for: 

      • Holes, tears, stains 
      • Faded fashions 
      • Ill-fitting pieces 
      • New, with tags, because you had a vision you never brought to fruition, or it simply got buried 
      • Single-purpose pieces (hello, bridesmaids dresses, costumes, and event and corporate swag) 

If you’re wrestling with the sentimental nature of a piece, Artifct that. You’ll feel better. 

Both of our cofounders have Artifcted old suits they wore in their government days. There’s a lot of memories in those suits and feelings of pride and accomplishment. You may know the feeling tied to a key garment and moment in your own life. Artifct that and then donate that to Dress for Success or a similar charity. Hot tip: If it’s a bridesmaid dress you’re thinking of donating, ask the bride before you donate, in case she harbors dreams of a vow renewal one day. We’re happy to save you the potential regret if you didn’t ask!

2. The ‘Why’ of Memento Boxes.

Now the existence and content of some of these keepsake boxes are open secrets, others not so much. But these keepsake boxes and memory boxes, no matter how cute, stylish or feng sui, are vulnerable to fire and flood as well as creatures that could find them munchable. In addition, the details behind what’s inside will easily fade from memory and more rapidly than you’d like to imagine.

 

 
True story: One of our co-founder's daughters recently created a memory box for school. She promises to Artifct first whatever goes into it. Will she? Time will tell. She already has more than 100 Artifcts, so there’s hope.

If you care about what’s in your memento boxes, we implore you to Artifct that. And talk through the contents with them. Have a seat. Share, more than once. Let them know you better. We will never tell you these types of boxes, in moderation, have to go. In fact, we believe everyone deserves a purple bin, yours might just be another color or style.

3. The Why of the Bulky Closet “Clutter.”

Yes, clutter lives in closets, too. We STASH so much in those closets. Take a look and ask about the why behind your stashes.  

A recent closet we were in had stashes of: 

      • Gifts to give “someday,”  
      • Unused frames in want of art or photos, 
      • Old, unused medical supplies, 
      • Brown paper bags of old tax documents and banking records, and 
      • A box of family heirlooms from a loved one who had passed away six years prior. 

The why of stashes often comes down to some form or procrastination. As Matt Paxton likes to say, “Procrastination kills memories.” Procrastination also creates chaos and kills the good intentions in the keeping. 

      • Organize what you want to keep and label it, if that will help you remember it’s there so you can put it to good use. The reason professional organizers love clear bins is to keep the items visible. But if labels do the trick—or a combination of both—go for it! If you are helping someone with dementia to declutter and organize, clear bins and photos have other purposes. Check out this ARTIcles story for insights and tips! 
      • Artifct items from loved ones and share those Artifcted stories so others can enjoy. Plus, if you don’t want to keep it all, your Artifcts become the easy means to ask if others would like to keep the items. Win-win!  
      • Donate unused—and in some cases lightly used—medical supplies through Goodwill or other similar charitable organizations in your community. 
      • If those old documents are more than seven years old, you’ll generally be okay to shred them yourself or at a community shred event. If in doubt, ask your financial advisor. But do not hang onto these where they can do you no good and only create vulnerability if someone were to use the information they contain to access  resources they should not.  
Procrastination kills memories. - Matt Paxton, TV host, author, public speaker

A storage bin for documents organized with labeled file folders can be a better than nothing option, but is nearly as problematic as a brown paper bag. A digital vault, like Trustworthy, can organize important documents via files and images you upload in no time and ensure vital information is accessible to you, your loved ones, and any tax, legal, or other advisors you employ. Bonus: Digital resources can be accessed anytime, from anywhere and you can even receive smart notifications when renewals and updates are required.

4. Special Closet Clutter: Kid Stuff.

We’re talking about reducing kid clutter we’ve found in closets, which admittedly feels a bit like touching the third rail. But hear us out! Do you really need to wardrobe a future generation? How much of it will breakdown or decay before it can ever be used again? And, perhaps most importantly, do you remember why it’s so special? No? Great, out and onward it goes. Yes? You know what we’re going to say: Artifct That.

An Artifct with dresses

 
 
Here’s a great example from our cofounder Ellen. She did keep a couple dresses that belonged to her daughter as a baby and a toddler. Notice we said a couple. But she also Artifcted them with pics of her daughter wearing the dresses to make it oh-so-easy to remember and share the why behind the dresses. CLICK THE IMAGE to view the Artifct.

While sentiment and frugal tendencies can be at play, sometimes you find people are holding onto stuff that their GROWN adults have ASKED them to keep, because they don’t have the space or do not want to take the time or pay the expense to ship it to their homes. Hard no. If you are ready to lighten the load in your home, give your grown adult children a deadline to claim the items. Yes, “adulting” can be hard, but enabling grown adult children to behave, well, like children, doesn’t generally end well. If you can relate, you might want to read or re-read this inspiring guest ARTIcles story from a dad who shared the tough love he showed his adult children during his downsizing experience.

Many of us struggle to bring our habits, best intentions, or even creative brains into play to help us get the job "decluttering" job done. For others, the stories behind the stuff get in our way. But keep in mind as you go room by room that like any muscle, decluttering requires practice. And Articting is here to support you along the way. Object by object as you Artifct you can reflect on what it is, why you have it, and make a decision on what will happen to that object in the future. 

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© 2024 Artifcts, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

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